happiness, life, personal
How do you get happiness? That's something that people have been asking themselves for thousands of years, without there being a general increase in the happiness of the population.
However, it is now easier than it ever was to find out how to be happy and to act on this information. What has caused this to happen?
The internet.
It is now possible to view just about everything that has ever been said on the subject, and to assess it for yourself, without having to traipse around a lot of dusty libraries, or have to make any pilgrimages to the Himalayan mountains.
It is also becoming more and more apparent that the best way to increase the happiness of the world is to increase that of those nearest to you, and for that, you need to increase your own store of happiness. In other words it has to start with you being happy, not with you making sacrifices of your happiness for the sake of others.
The writers who have kindly contributed articles for this blog will supply you with a wealth of tips, ideas and information. All you need to do is to look around this blog. (There are no pop-ups or spams that we know of on this blog, so you can click with confidence!)
How to Get Happiness
Am I Happy With Life?
By Ross G
It's an interesting question - am I happy with life? The answer to this is so subjective - take two people and put them in identical situations - you may find that one person feels happy and fulfilled, and the other person feels like something is missing.
There is no foolproof algorithm that can be applied to make people feel happy! In my own life, I am by nature not a person who often feels depressed / lonely or sad. Because of this, I have had difficulty in the past relating to people who are feeling these things. As a typical Australian, I have often responded with 'how bout they get over it!', or 'boo hoo for you, cry a river!'
However, in the past year my feelings have been changing. I'm not quite sure if this is because I'm getting older and therefore more aware of the 'greater picture', or if it's because I'm getting older and feeling like time is moving more quickly! It might even be more related my current situation - am I feeling fulfilled in some areas but not in others?
To help me understand this age old question, I have taken some time to explore why we feel this way. Obviously there are many stressors in life that can add to feelings of unhappiness, and there are plenty of personal circumstances that influence the way people feel also. I am a big believer that the perception of 'happiness' or living a life where you feel fulfilled ultimately starts with your mindset.
This is great news! Why? because you don't have to be subjected to the feelings that you and I experience (unhappiness, depression, lack of joy or apathy) forever! WHATEVER your personal situation, you can reach a place where you once again feel happy in your life.
Think for a moment: Why is it that we see some amazing stories about people who are subjected to horrible things then have an amazing recovery that sees them become leaders in their field & fantastic, inspiring public speakers that help others who have been hurt. Then we see others who have not had any major dramas in their life fall into emotional situations like depression and unhappiness?
I'm not suggesting that there is a quick fix for this problem! But I do have a greater understanding that the key to feeling happy with life involves a few truths:
- We need to realise that regardless of past experiences, there is so much to gain from life! - A key to having a happy, fulfilling life is understanding the power of your mindset - We can make a conscious decision to change our attitudes!
- Article posted in Life Choices
Read more from this author at:
Will It Change You? - willitchangeyou.com
Your Portal for Personal Growth
Health and Happiness - Self Test
By Dianne Wandruff
First of all, examine yourself outwardly.
Look at your fingernails. Are they glossy? Do they appear nice and strong? How about your hair? It should be shiny and full of body. Now look at your tongue. Does it have a white coating on it or is it pink? Next your eyes: are they bright or dull...do they appear to be happy eyes or worried or lackluster? Do your eyes have brown flecks in them? If they do, those spots indicate injuries or malfunctions within your body...depending upon the location of the fleck.
How about your skin, which is your largest organ. Does your skin have bumps, moles of various colors, liver spots of varying sizes? Whatever is represented on your skin is represented upon your brain as well (except the spots there are at least twice as large). Do you have any evidence of jaundice (yellowish skin or eyeballs? orange skin or eyeballs?). If so, your liver has overflowed and the toxins are trying to exit your body through your skin! Bumps on your upper arms indicate hormonal imbalance, bumps on your neck and/or cheeks show that your liver is challenged.
Let's consider your internal health.
How about your bowel movements? Do your bowels move after eating each meal or snack? (They should.) Do you have headaches? Are your headaches food related or stress related or reason unknown? Do you have digestive troubles: discomfort or pain or malfunction in your throat, esophagus, stomach, intestines, or rectum? Do you have parasite pain that you're aware of? (All of us have parasites, usually about 3 pounds worth...) Are you in pain anywhere else?
Do you have a good appetite for natural and wholesome foods or do you crave sweets and packaged or fast foods? Do you drink pure water more than you drink anything else? Do you drink too many hot drinks and have to go pee often? Do you have habits you'd like to be rid of? Do you have repetitious thoughts that you can't stop?
Are you full of vibrant energy, waking up each morning ready to live creatively and relate well with those around you? Are you tired at all? Do you feel physically awkward or are you agile and self-confident about your body?
And think about how you relate to others as well as what you think about yourself.
Are you outgoing? Do you care about other people as a general rule? Do you smile as you walk? Do you frown? Are you burdened about your future? Do you have fearful pricks or fearful jolts in your chest? Do they emanate all the way up your neck and out through your head? Do you have anything to be ashamed about? Do you feel free and pleased with life. Do you have enough time? Are you trustful that you're doing well within your circle of influence?
What to do now. Take action.
You MUST consider what your self test has revealed about your outward health and your inner vibrancy. Where do you want to go from here? Do you want to address any of these issues...whether outward issues or inward physical issues or invisible spiritual type issues?
I hope you do. And I'll tell you right up front that I'm a big advocate of brutal honesty with one's self and with God. I talk out loud between me and God all the time. I lay it out very plainly for myself to hear at the same time I'm speaking to my Creator. Usually I walk in a place where I can be as loud as I want to and sound as crazy as I want to!
YOU do that too. I want you to address each shortcoming that you have, whether physical OR spiritual. Be transparent for your own sake. It feels so good to get it all out in the open. I think that's because honest exposure leads to the next step: making a plan, resolving the issue, finding needed relief. Admit to yourself what has been niggling at the back of your mind: you need help! you have some physical problems that need to be solved before they turn into disease...you need to find sweet spiritual peace and happy freedom right on the inside of yourself! You need to take care because it's just you and God alone in this universe. No one else really knows you and no one else is as responsible for yourself as you are. Don't let your life slip by. Take action!
If I were you, for part of my recovery plan, I'd check into therapeutic essential oils for my body and my invisible parts. The oils affect our emotions and our personality as much as they do our physical bodies. Who really needs these therapeutic essential oils?
people who lack energy at any time but bedtime
people who work in the public where they're exposed to germs
people who have back troubles of ANY kind
people who get worried and stressed
those of us who have small children
those of us who relate to one other person or a thousand others
those of us who need to pamper ourselves and relax
students
people of all ages, even little children and the very old
you, who have taken this self test and realize you have several different kinds of shortcomings
You may learn more about essential oils that are therapeutic/medicinal/emotionally healing and soothing.
1. You may purchase any oils or supplements by going to Young Living Essential Oils online. If you just don't know where to begin, choose the Essential 7 Kit which was created so anyone could immediately begin to use the most popular oils. Directions come with the kit, teaching you to use them topically or internally by capsule or to diffuse them at home or the office. This kit is very useful. Remember to use my number 605520 when ordering your products.
2. You may call me and book a consultation by phone. (406) 882-4050 MST home office: 866 271-8704 toll free.
3. You may attend one of my free workshops OR request a transcript of a free workshop. We hold workshops several times a month and the format and content of each one is innovative and interesting. There's a lot of questions/answering, laughing, hands-on participation... lots to see and smell. Call (406) 882-4050 MST, Fortine, MT, for instructions and information regarding workshops.
With her flair for setting people at ease about themselves, Dianne helps you look your best. Committed to leading people around the world into financial freedom and a beautiful future, she attracts people like you, who are ready for change and ready to work steadily.
http://www.linkedin.com/in/diannewandruff
She is a grammie par excellence!; a homemaker for two; a gardener of huge, healthy veggies and brilliant ever-blooming flowers; a hiker/walker; and an anti-aging specialist.
Dianne lives with her husband, David, in a romantic valley tucked up under the Canadian border...in northwest Montana.
406 882-4050 MST home office
866 271-8704 toll free
Your Blissful Life - Your Definition
By Timothy A McGinty
The beauty of your blissful life is the simple fact that it is all yours! You, and only you, define exactly what it means to you, in every part of your life. There have never been two individuals wanting exactly the same thing in every part of their lives. While they may share some common desires, they will have unique meanings for their respective blissful lives. Just as each of us are a unique beautiful people, so is our definition of our blissful life! As you execute the process of defining your blissful life, you are creating a work of art that is all you. Your work of art is you in all your beauty and glory.
How can each of us have such a unique definition for the same object of our desires? Let me explain;
As I discussed in earlier articles, we are all made up of many components or parts. Recall also that all of these aspects or parts are unique to each and every one of us. It is because of this that we all place different values on our various parts. l place a certain value or importance on my professional career while you place a completely different value or importance on yours. You may place greater importance on your relationship with your friends (your friends part) as opposed to your professional career. Everyone you know such as your significant other, mother, father, and siblings, acquaintances etc. will all place various parts higher or lower on their importance scale when compared to yours.
The importance that we each place on our various parts uniquely defines not only who we are and how we act; it also uniquely defines your blissful life. The reason that you are currently reading this article is you, for some reason, feel a need to redefine, re-rank, resolve a conflict within or between your parts, or to define new parts and integrate them into yourself. This is your unique definition. This is how you identify, compare, and take action on a daily basis, in every moment. Everything you do is driven to satisfy and achieve the definition you have for your parts which, when combined, define yourself as a person.
After completing my this and my next two articles, you will have identified all of your parts, ranked them in order of importance to yourself and your life, and what you want your blissful life to look, sound, and feel like to you.
For me, your blissful life means a balance between my parts that allowed me to assist others in achieving their goals while providing a satisfactory standard of living. It also means that I have the freedom and permission from myself to continue to grow and discover more about myself and the world I live in, no matter what! To me this means that there are no silly or ridiculous ideas or paths. I have given myself permission to explore all of them, no matter where they might lead. I have learned that in order for me to live my blissful life, I must be true to myself, my ideals, my thoughts, my intuition, and my feelings. When I do this, I can do anything, be anything, and discover anything I desire. When I am doing this and helping others enrich their lives that I am truly living my blissful life.
Take some time now to reflect;
Review your list of parts my previous article Your Blissful Life: The Struggle Within.
Review all of the parts you identified after reading the article.
Have you discovered any other parts? If so, note them here.
Mr. Timothy A. McGinty is the published co-author of the highly regarded Wake Up... Live the Life You Love® series. This series is a collaborative effort with such inspirational leaders as Tony Robbins, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Brian Tracey, Steven E, and Lee Beard.
Mr. Timothy A. McGinty is the published co-author of the highly regarded Wake Up... Live the Life You Love® series. This series is a collaborative effort with such inspirational leaders as Tony Robbins, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Brian Tracey, Steven E, and Lee Beard.
Mr. McGinty is also the author of "Your Blissful Life", a book which takes the reader by the hand and walks them through a process for defining their "Blissful Life" and the action plan for achieving it.
Imagine Yourself... is an organization focused on enabling clients "breakthrough" in achieving their success. Mr. McGinty has helped many organizations and individuals discover their passion, define the life balance they seek, develop strategies for achieving that balance, and held them accountable for reaching their goals. His clients have been so successful that Mr. McGinty is known as "The Breakthrough Guy"
Imagine Yourself...
13477 Prospect Rd. Suite 204
Strongsville, Ohio 44149
Telephone: 440-236-6519
Web: http://www.timothymcginty.com
E-mail: tim@timothymcginty.com
Live a Great Life - Use the Powerful 'What If' Question to Invent the Life You Want
By Jay Forte
One of the most significant ways to access your creative side is to ask powerful "What if..." questions. These questions both enable and compel you to invent, imagine, dream and discover. "What if..." questions encourage you to see what you generally miss as you move at breakneck speed through life; they encourage you to think, to take a stand and to own your work and your life.
Open a journal and select one of these "What if..." questions. As you record your thoughts, allow yourself to consider greater and greater possibilities. This is not about being right or wrong - it is about creating, dreaming and visualizing. The more you can imagine, the more you can create.
When ready, select another question or create one of your own. Have your work team or your family participate in this "What if..." exercise. Not only does it encourage a broader definition of you and your performance, but it helps you search out opportunities and possibilities. It allows you to step forward and own your responses. It helps you to imagine the greatest vision of you.
What if my life could be exactly as I want it?
What would it be?
What if my family was the way I want a family to be?
How would I encourage it?
What if my dreams could really come true?
What would I wish for?
What if happiness were entirely within my control?
How would you live it?
What if money could only do good?
How would I spend it?
What if a kind word could really make a difference?
What would I say?
What if I could improve the quality of life of just one person?
Who would it be and what would I do?
What if I could make a difference with someone just with a smile?
To whom would I give that smile?
What if I could love what I do for work every day?
What job would I have?
What if when I learned something important that I could pass it on?
What story or lesson would I share and with whom?
What if I could do something extraordinary and receive no credit for it?
What would I do and who would benefit?
What if I could choose what success is for me?
What would I choose?
What if I could have dinner with a famous person?
Who would it be and what would we talk about?
What if I could talk to God?
What would I ask and what do I think he would he say?
What if I could do something that would make a great difference to my family?
What would it be and when can I do it?
What if I had 10 minutes with the President of the country?
What would I talk about?
What if I had a free afternoon to spend with my kids?
What would we do and what memories would we create?
What if I were remembered for something great I did?
What would it be?
What if I could have the greatest adventure of my life?
What would it be?
What if I could address an assembly of young people/older people?
What is something valuable I could I tell them?
What if the direction of the company were left up to me?
Which direction would I bring it?
'What if...' questions are the powerhouse of creative practice and discovery. The more you use the curious 'What if...' approach, the greater your options become, the more options you consider and the more significant impact you make. Invent your 'What if...' questions and use them to make a considerable difference in the quality of your life and work and in the lives and work of others.
Jay Forte is a powerful performance speaker, consultant, author and founder of Humanetrics, LLC. He works with managers who want to be more successful in activating and inspiring exceptional employee performance, to significantly drive customer loyalty and improve company profitability. Jay, a CPA/financial executive turned educator, turned consultant, is renowned for producing significant results. He is a highly engaging speaker and is working on an upcoming book "Fire Up Your Employees and Smoke Your Competition; How to Invite, Incite and Ignite Performance" For information on keynotes, seminars and consulting, or to see the daily "BLOGucation," visit: http://www.humanetricsllc.com, his new site http://www.fireupyouremployees.com or call: 401-338-3505.
Six Steps to Happiness
By Mary McCauley
Step One:
Accept where you are at the moment and make the best of it. Take time to know where you want to be and how to get there, but for now be in the moment. Don't wish for yesterday, but do dream about tomorrow. What steps can your take to be where you want to be? What actions do you need to take to get there but wait, be sure it's where you truly want to be. Right now, be happy where you are.
Step Two:
Be Willing to Learn. There is no truth to the axiom 'you can't teach and old dog new tricks'. No matter where we are in life, we are capable of learning something new. Never stop learning, it can bring so much joy.
Step Three:
Simplify Your Life. What is it that makes us think the more we do the better we are? Why do we allow ourselves to become so over burdened with 'have to do this and have to do that'? When do we take time to just 'be'. Can we be happy running here, dashing there, getting this, getting that? We need to choose what we are going to do carefully. If it isn't vital to your life, you can turn it down. Omit one unnecessary thing from your life right now and make time to just be.
Step Four:
Anticipate. Look forward to things coming into your life. Visualize them. Feel them as if they are already here. A warmth will embrace you, a smile will sneak onto your face and your eyes will light up. This is how happiness feels. This is what you can make happen. Believe in yourself and anticipate good things.
Step Five:
Spread Happiness. Wherever you go, take a moment to do something that will make another person feel good. See if you can make someone smile. The more people you can give a feeling of happiness to, the more happiness you will feel.
Throw off thoughts that are negative, they don't belong in your life. Wrap yourself in those things that bring you joy and keep them always within reach.
Step Six:
Be Thankful. No matter what you have in your life, be thankful. Start a gratitude journal. Everyday take a moment to be thankful for something, even if it is just that you got up in the morning and had a new day to embrace happiness in your life. Be thankful for the little things, then watch as the bigger things come into your life. It happens. You can start it happening right now by being thankful for this moment.
Author, retired group tour director, I spend my time helping others on the internet in various areas of living. From traveling free to a healthier heart, my life time experiences and my joy of researching subjects I hope help people. I love sharing what I learn.
My most recent helpful post is Cruise FREE and Get Paid Too.
I love writing, communicating and being with my grandkids. It truly is a great life.
Happiness Is An Activity
Everyone is looking for happiness. But most people only feel like they are experiencing the lack of it.
In this blog, one of the things we try to emphasize is that happiness is an ACTIVITY, not something that you just passively get once the circumstances are right. Many people think that as soon as they have a few million dollars in the bank, THEN they will be happy, but not before. How often does it happen though? And even when it does and those people get the money, frequently they do not get happy as a result.
Happiness comes from within you. And once you have found it, the other things like wealth and success will follow.
In the following post, Jerry Graham explains to us how choosing your friends carefully can have a massive effect on your happiness and success levels.
Growing Up Backwards
It seems like I set out in this life to do things my own way and in my own time - no matter what was wise or prudent or tried, tested and true. And, regardless of the advice I give my own daughters, I continue to 'grow up backwards.'
To my daughters I say things like:
"You have all the time in the world, enjoy now, figure out what you want and who you are before you begin to think about starting a family."
"Take your time - get into a relationship because you WANT to, not because you feel you NEED to."
"Listen to your gut, your 'inner bell'. Do what makes you feel full of life and secure in the knowledge that you're where you need to be at this moment."
"Don't look for a man to complete you - look for a man to complement you."
"Learn how to make yourself happy - never expect another human being to take on that responsibility."
And, I'm right, I know I am - doesn't every mom know that?
Thing is, it took me two marriages (and subsequent divorces), six kids and living as a single mom for five years to learn those lessons. Most kids (at least when I was a teen) grew up, graduated high school, went to college, dated, had fun, and THEN settled down to have a family.
They gave themselves a chance to spread their wings and find out who they were and what they wanted before they allowed their wings to be clipped by marriage and parenthood.
Not me.
I got married at 17, first child at 18. Now, at age 40, I have six children ranging in ages from almost 22 to 12 and am in my sixth year of 'independence.'
I have finally learned the lessons I'm trying to teach my own children. I know my words are true because I'm living both the results of learning their wisdom and the results of ignoring it. I did it backwards. So I know what it's like from both perspectives.
I know that my own happiness is dependent upon me - no one else. When you burden another human being with the responsibility for your own happiness, you're setting them up for failure and yourself up for pain.
I've learned that when you look to someone to complete you, you drain their very being. Most folks have enough problems dealing with themselves - their own dreams and fears and flaws and responsibilities. When you find someone to complement you - then you can find out what real friendship is, what real unconditional love is - what real peace is.
I've learned that I don't need a man. Sure, there's a lot I miss. I miss the hugs, the laughs, the strength, the partnership, the feeling that I'm not always in this 'all alone'. And it's ok to miss those things. But I don't NEED one. Someday I will probably want another relationship. But I don't have to have one now - because I'm finally learning who I am and what I'm capable of - and it's much more than I ever gave myself credit for. And that is super cool.
I know that I've lived the majority of my 40 years for someone else - a parent, a husband, a child - and that's ok - it taught me, molded me, strengthened me. I wouldn't change the pattern of my life if I could. But when you finally figure out who you are - and further, figure out that you LIKE who you are, the difference in the level of chaos inside is absolutely astounding.
I am me, I like me, there's things I am working to change and there's things that I'm very proud of - but no matter what, I like me - no matter WHAT someone else thinks or says.
That is the ultimate freedom - and one you can't teach your children - they just have to learn it - maybe backwards. And that's ok, too.
Dee Braun, a single mom of 6 kids, is a Certified Aromatherapist, Certified Dr. of Reflexology and a natural health practitioner. You can visit her at Mom's Blog - http://www.moms-blog.com - a blog just for moms (and dads!) which offers more information on green living, children's health, child natural remedies and parenting advice and insight.
** You are free to use/reprint this article as long as the Author information/bio AND the link within the article stay active and in tact!
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7 Ways to Know the Elusive It!
How many people are still trying to find IT? You know what I mean, the elusive IT, your very own Genie in a bottle who will turn life's hurricanes into sunny days for you? After a lifetime of curiosity, study and personal experience I attracted IT! Yes, I found IT, my very own Genie who saved my life and allows me to play a bigger game. A bigger game is about creating your own reality instead of living life by default. Are you ready to find IT? May I suggest you are ready, otherwise you would be reading something else right now! Enjoy!
Did you ever play 'tag'?
Remember how fun it was to run and chase each other until we got close enough to stretch our little arms as far as they would reach and yell, "You're IT" then run away as fast as our little legs would carry us!
Over the years IT kept showing up on my radar screen as a mystery. You know what I mean; the elusive IT individuals seek outside themselves. Our very own Genie in a bottle to turn life's hurricanes into sunny days!
A lifetime of curiosity, studying ancient teachings, the newer sciences like quantum physics and applying what I learned, brought IT to me! Yes! I found IT and now you can too!
Here are 7 ways to experience YOUR truth, when you are ready. I suggest the fact you found this article may be a 'clue' that you are ready!
1. Be aware ... are you willing to open your mind and heart to another reality? Reality is not what your eyes show your mind; reality is what your mind creates for your eyes to see. New awareness invites you to explore who you are another way and create the reality you choose instead of playing small. There are millions of resources to expand awareness through Internet.
2. Be present ... Imagine outer life is a gigantic movie screen where every person, event and circumstance is on time and on purpose. When you are present, new awareness allows you to see beyond limiting beliefs and patterns. Every present moment is an invitation to expand awareness of yourself through personal 'experience' so you can play a bigger game!
3. Be focused ... everything is energy with power to cause things to happen including our beliefs, thoughts, words, actions and feelings. Our ability to think makes us creators! YIKES!
What we oppose grows so focus ONLY on what you DO want. End judgment, criticism, complaining, blame and other low vibration reactions. Why? Because focusing on what you do not want attracts more of the same! You creator you!
4. Be your word 100% ... this is huge family! Be authentic and be consistent! Keep your commitments unless there is mutual agreement to change them. Failing to be your word creates chaos within you that will show up on your movie screen in life. Continued chaos and escalation are repeat invitations to mature parts of you by coming into full integrity; a prerequisite to playing a bigger game.
5. Be grateful ... How we do the little things influences the bigger things in life. When life sends you a gift, regardless of how insignificant it may appear to you, receive with gratitude! Pick up that penny on the ground and exclaim, "Thank you, thank you, thank you! I am a money magnet!"
Let someone open that door or help you in other ways. Refusal ... is an energetic signal you are closed, causing life to redirect its many gifts to someone who is open to receive and grateful!
6. Be curious ... You are more than what meets the eye. Whatever shows up on your movie screen in life is your creation and within you is the ability to make quantum improvements. Google Consciousness; quantum physics; Law of Attraction; Charles F Haanel; Barbara Marx Hubbard; Wallace D Wattles; Our Ultimate Reality. Ask deeper questions!
7. Be IT ... the elusive IT is within you! The SOULution to every dilemma is inside you. Every present moment on your movie screen in life, IT is showing you what is truly going on inside you. It is showing you hidden parts of yourself ready to mature and play a bigger game! Every experience is an invitation to know the REAL you in body mind spirit!
The elusive IT we seek outside ourselves is Inner Truth or Spirit, a particle of Consciousness known by many names including God, Life, Yahweh, Allah, Universal Mind, All That Is or Other Name.
You are IT ... Inner Truth or Spirit
As IT uniquely expresses, experiences, expands
and evolves throughout eternity.
Instead of recommended chemo and radiation early 2007, my Inner Truth or Spirit restored wellness following the removal of a tumor found to be in stage 3 colon cancer. Pay IT forward will you?
Doreen blends 33 years in corporate with a lifetime of personal development and experiential learning to 'experience' truth rather than parrot others beliefs. Doreen's recipe for creating the life you truly want includes a curious mind, open heart and willingness to explore the unfamiliar.
Inspired by ancient wisdom and newer sciences like quantum physics, Doreen explored deep within herself where she found IT ... the elusive IT, her very own Genie in a bottle, opening a world of new beginnings and endless possibilities.
"I teach people how to remember truth. Whose truth? Inner truth or spirit, the only power that is real. I consider myself an Alchemist, helping people transform life's perceived hurricanes into sunny days."
In 2007, Doreen was diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer. Active cancer cells following surgical removal of the tumour called for chemo and radiation. Instead, Doreen connected within to the only Power that is Real and within 6 months her biology was restored to wellness naturally and permanently.
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Positive Self Talk - The Real Secret Weapon to Happiness
By Rhegina Sinozich
Positive self talk can transform your life and that's no understatement.
Imagine what your life would be like if you had a kid fresh out of college, fired up about the world, fired up about you. Imagine that this kid is going door to door selling YOU! She's fired up. She thinks you're the best. She's full of energy.
And now the best part of this is that she's really just a little genie sitting on your shoulder talking to you all day long. She doesn't see your flaws. She doesn't see your failures. She interprets all those things differently. Life is feeling pretty darned good. That's the power of positive self talk.
* Your failures aren't failures anymore; they're just missed tries.
* Your flaws aren't flaws anymore; they're just little quirks that will just change in time.
* Your hopes and dreams are completely realistic and exciting... because after all, you're the best!
Where can you get one of those little shoulder genies right? Well you can create one.
Positive self talk is unimaginably powerful. Your self talk is like having someone sitting on your shoulder whispering things to you, every day, every year for your entire life. So you really want it to be as positive as possible.
I mean if you were choosing a boss, would you choose one who yelled at you all the time and cut you down? Or one that was supportive and excited about you and your potential?
So here are some simple steps to creating one of those positive self talk genies:
* Take a few days or weeks to listen in. Just notice. Don't judge yourself. Don't try to change it, just listen. You can't change your self talk into positive self talk if you don't even know what you're saying to yourself! You might even want to jot down what you're hearing in a journal.
* After you have a good idea of how you're treating yourself through your self talk, intend to transform your relationship with yourself into a positive one. Intend that positive self talk is just going to become second nature for you. Intention is powerful and it sets the stage.
* Listen in regularly to your self talk and start interrupting. Even if you can't counter it with something positive just interrupting is powerful. You can even say something like "I'm not talking like that to myself anymore." That sends a powerful message to your brain.
* Actively seek out those things in your life and in you that you like and can honestly glow about and love. Get that positive self talk flowing. The catch here is that it really doesn't matter if you're talking about yourself or something out in the world. The only caveat is that it's positive and it feels good.
Pepper yourself positive, every day, in as many ways as you can and before long positive self talk will take root in a major way in your life and your life will flourish and that's no overstatement.
Rhegina Sinozich is the author of an amazing new book that will teach you how to reenergize yourself and your life so that you can create the life you really want to be living.
Want more HAPPINESS in your life? Plug Yourself Into the Frequency of Happiness will teach, inspire and motivate you to quickly come into alignment with who you really are so you can start living the life you were meant to live. http://www.balloontothemoon.com
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Finding Happiness
How can you achieve happiness in life? Can real happiness ever be achieved? Yes it can! In our featured article, Steven Milbrandt takes you through a 10 step plan to achieve the life you always wanted.
10 Steps to Becoming Happy Now
By Steven Milbrandt
Feeling happy is something everyone wants. Whether on not you admit it to yourself, being happy is something each of us seeks. The positive feelings the come from helping others and doing something well are wonderful. These are two examples of actions that we take that provide us good feelings. This reinforces our desire to do more. A cycle of positive repeatable actions not only benefits the intended recipient but also the giver. This is an example of a tangible action with verifiable results. Philanthropists do what they do for a number of reasons. They often express it this way: They want to give back for the good they have received. Yes they may not do what they do for purely altruistic reasons, but neither can we, nor should we attempt to determine motives by speculation.
Isn't it better to make every attempt to live a happy and satisfied life and help others to do the same? A famous person once said, "Give enough people what they want and you will get what you want too." The problem is that negative circumstances and problems seem to crowd our lives. The result is that often people become overwhelmed, discouraged and depressed. How can you move from feeling negative, despite all that is around you that makes you feel much less positive than you would like to be? Below are "10 Steps to Being Happy Now". Read them through and find more information at the end of this article.
1. Realize that feelings whether good or bad are just feelings. This means that you can change them. You are the one who gives yourself permission to feel a certain way in any given moment. No one else can tell you how to feel.
2. A feeling is a signal that your body gives you to take action. Recognize this and evaluate what your next step should be. Often we don't know what steps to take or take the wrong action. This does not resolve the problem. Often it only makes it worse. Try to be aware of the signals that your mental and physical states are trying to tell you and take corrective action. Sometimes these feelings are the result of negative events just past.
3. Sometimes events trigger negative associations from the past and we are not even aware of this. A long passed event buried in our subconscious mind can resurface. Therefore be as aware of your past as possible and reinforce negative events with positive ones in your mind.
4. Your mind is like a computer. It will play back to us whatever we give it. If we focus on negative things, then that is what will show up in our thoughts and actions most often. Give yourself positive thoughts and associations. When you find yourself thinking a negative thing, force yourself to stop the thought process in your head and replace it with something positive.
5. Reflect on all the good things there are in your life. The fact that you are even able to evaluate your situation and move toward some positive outcome is a good thing.
6. Take time to step outside of your situation and do some good for someone else. Even if it is just listening to someone or offering your time to them. This is a worthwhile contribution and a valuable gift. Time is limited so when you give some away for the good of others, you really are giving of yourself.
7. Remember that the person you are now is the result of all your past thoughts and actions. While this may seems scary, if we used that information to act and think more positively, we can change our outcomes and begin living a better and more fulfilling life.
8. Give yourself permission to be sad or depressed and a negative event, situation or circumstances for a specific set period then move on with a fresh outlook and optimism.
9. Resolve that the most important choice you can make on a daily basis regardless of your circumstance is your choice of attitude.
10. Being happy is not dependent on what you have. Some of the poorest people on the planet are the happiest. In contrast, some of the richest are the unhappiest. If you set your happiness on things, you will always be disappointed. True happiness comes from inside. This is often related to finding something bigger than us to believe it.
When we look for the good around us we will find it. Inspire someone today with your keen sense of self, a positive self-image and a passion for helping others. Happiness does not need to be elusive and complicated. Become aware of the signals that your mental and physical body is giving you. Learn to take proper action of the electro-chemical signals in your body and you will find happiness.
To learn more please visit the Marketplace section of http://www.learnherenow.com You can also find this article there. Also feel free to visit my sister site at http://www.stevenmilbrandt.com Thank you for the opportunity to share these insights with you.
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Are There Lucky People?
By Steve Gillman
Most of us know lucky people, those who seem to lived a charmed life. They may not even be all that smart, and yet they seem to almost stumble into good situations. Opportunities open up for them, things are "handed" to them. Perhaps they win in the stock market, find a dream job, or get married to their ideal spouse.
Then there are the unlucky people. Maybe you know a few of these as well. Some of them may even be very intelligent or well educated, and yet they're unlucky in love, lose money on investments, miss opportunities, and have unexpected bad things happen.
You might be somewhere between these two extremes. You have some good luck, and you have your share of "bad luck" as well. But have you ever tried to learn how to be one of the lucky people?
Generally there are two approaches to the idea of luck. Some think it is a random or mysterious thing that we have no control over, while others say it doesn't exist, that what we call luck is hard work, or a lazy way to explain cause and effect. Yet we all see that some people have easier successes, whether we call it luck or not. What both approaches tend to miss is the obvious question: How can you become one of these "lucky people?"
The answer to that starts with avoiding that mistake right there. Stop arguing about definitions. It's more profitable to make good things happen. Does it really matter if you earn the title of "lucky" even though you feel that "luck" had nothing to do with it? The bottom line is that good results are good results, whatever they are called.
One Thing Lucky People Do Differently
There are many things that lucky people do differently, and there is even serious research that demonstrates this. It has been shown that people who are identified as lucky smile more often, for example. And among those who are superstitious (entirely unnecessary for luck), the research shows lucky people have more positive beliefs, like crossing the fingers, while those who avoid black cats and fear the number thirteen have less luck.
Of all the many things that lucky people do differently, though, perhaps one of the most effective is simply asking for things. How many of us don't ever ask for a nicer table in a restaurant, or ask for a raise at work. Doing so doesn't guarantee anything, but asking certainly increases the odds of receiving. It's safe to say that you'll get more raises and nice tables in life if you ask.
For example, in his book, "Screw It - Let's Do It," Richard Branson tells the story of how he bought a $3,000,000 pound island for $180,000. That's just 7% of the asking price, by the way. Here's the short version of how he did it: He asked. I imagine there were those who would have loved to get the island for twice what he paid, since that would still be an 86% discount. But they probably never made the offer, embarrassed to ask for such a low price.
As a young man I bought my first house by advertising. I put a small ad in the paper saying I was looking for a small home with a small down payment and seller financing. I got a call and soon bought my first home. Ask and you shall receive, as the saying goes.
So are there lucky people? Yes, and if you want to be one of them, consider the following three premises:
1. "Lucky" people are those who have more happy surprises and good situations in their lives.
2. Their good luck is a result of the way they think and act.
3. You can become one of them by learning and applying certain principles (like the one above.)
Copyright Steve Gillman. Learn specific ways to Get Lucky right now at: http://www.GoodLuckSecrets.com
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Happiness - How To Get It In Three Easy Steps
Happiness - everyone wants it, everyone dreams of having it, but for most of us, happiness just seems like an impossible dream. In the world of today, when everything is so fast-paced and stressful, how can happiness ever be achieved? And while it may be all right for those who have money and can buy their way into being happy, for most everybody else it just seems like life is destined to be miserable. With all these disadvantages, how can happiness ever be possible?
Well to begin with, it is no more difficult to become happy in the modern world than it has ever been. And the good news is that happiness can start from where you are, whatever the circumstances. It doesn't matter if you have no money, once you start getting happiness by applying these Three Easy Steps, everything else will follow, including prosperity.
Step One: The first thing you must consider is that no one else can be relied on to make you happy. Yes it might happen, but ultimately your own happiness has to come from within you. So start for yourself, and don't wait for other people. Also it is important that you don't take too much notice of the opinions of others. Once you have decided for yourself what makes you happy, then go with that, whatever other people say. We don't mean that you should be arrogant, but you should be self-reliant.
Step Two: This leads on to the next step, which is to spend some time deciding what makes you happy. If you think carefully about this, you may find that what you come up with is different to what other people may expect of you. Think about those things in your life which make you happy, but also about those things that are not currently around you in your life but which you would like to have. It does not have to be only objects that you think about, it can be ideas, or relationships, anything you choose.
Step Three: Once you have made a good long list of what makes you happy, then focus all your attention on those things or ideas or people. As you give them your attention more and more, you will find that they begin to figure more importantly in your life. As this happens, you will certainly find that more opportunities arise for you to be happy.
The important thing is not to allow other people to drag you down to their own miserable level. This is a characteristic of negative people, they have a need for someone else to share their miserable outlook on life.
Think for yourself, decide what makes you happy, and then focus all your attention on that. There you have the Three Easy Steps to happiness!
Find Happiness in 2008
by Faye Hollands
Step 1
GET CLEAR AND IN CONTROL
I'm willing to bet you probably spend more time planning your weekends than you do planning to be happy! You need to put clear goals in place otherwise it's easy to stumble through life, getting lost in the daily grind. Sit down today and get creative - design the life you want to lead, organise how you're going to do it, and enjoy being in control of your own future. Aside from having clarity and direction, you'll find life's a lot more fun when you know where you're going!
Step 2
GET HEALTHY
Now this isn't rocket science but given the obesity levels in Australia and general lack of well-being I think the obvious needs to be said. If you're sick, tired, and sluggish you're going to find it hard to be perky. Time and time again scientific evidence proves that healthy living can increase your levels of happiness. Stop putting time and effort into excuses and instead choose to invest in your well-being today. Go for a walk, drink more water - whatever you do, make it an investment in your wellbeing!
Step 3
GET A BRIGHT OUTLOOK
Optimistic and positive people live longer, get sick less, are more successful, have better relationships, and are more likely to succeed in their careers. Those are all proven facts. Do you really need any more reasons to start being positive? Decide how you want to see the world, stop looking for the negative, and practice having a perky perspective today. There are millions of people in the world worse-off than you - write a list today of 5 things you have to be positive about and put a smile on your face. Being upbeat won't kill you!
Step 4
GET TOGETHER
Good quality relationships, both personally and professionally, help reduce stress and depression, and increase your sense of well-being. Make a concerted effort to seek out positive, perky people and surround yourself with them everyday. Call your most fun friend now and make arrangements to see them this week, or join a new networking group to expand your social and professional circles.
Step 5
GET PERKY NOW
Stop saying 'When' and start living 'Now'. Are there any reasons why you would postpone being happy until tomorrow? Stop making excuses and start living your life today - no-one else can do if for you! Put your Perky Plan into place today, start living in the moment, and put mediocre behind you for good. Take responsibility for your happiness. After all, being upbeat can't kill you; but being glum just might!
Copyright (c) 2008 Outshine Consulting Pty Ltd
Faye Hollands, Director of Outshine Consulting, is a Certified Life Coach, Executive Coach and professional trainer with 15 years experience in financial and professional services. Faye's direct and to-the-point style of coaching, combined with NLP and Time Line Therapy techniques, provide her clients with fast, long lasting results in all areas of their life, career and business. Start realising your potential today!
http://www.outshineconsulting.com.au
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Seven Gateways to Happiness A Positive Psychology Method for Increased Happiness
by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein
What are the tools to get to THE ENCHANTED SELF® part of ourselves? What skills do we need in order to find happiness that is unique and sustainable for each person?
This paper outlines the positive psychology methods that you need to employ to enter each of the “Seven Gateways to Happiness.â€
First Gateway: Honoring what is Right about Ourselves Rather Than What is Wrong
As women, we're all experts in identifying what is wrong with ourselves. We can probably quickly make up a long list, detailing what is wrong in our lives. However, it's a lot harder to get in touch with what is right. We need to know ourselves in positive ways. We need to learn how to honor our talents, strengths, even our coping skills which serve us so well. And most important, we need to treasure and enjoy our potential.
These parts of us, if not honored, identified and talked about both to ourselves and to others, will lose their power. We have to keep igniting them. We need to get to know ourselves in ways that emphasize the heroic, strong parts of ourselves. This means using our memories in very different ways from what we've been accustomed to. It means searching through our history to find our talents, strengths and even lost potential, even if we have to sort through pounds of dysfunction. It means searching our past for what is right about ourselves, not for what is wrong.
Gateway Two: Falling in Love with Ourselves
This is an extremely important gateway. This gateway is achieved after we have made efforts to reclaim and honor our talents, capacities, strengths, lost potential and coping skills. Now we are ready. We no longer break our hearts by putting ourselves down and saying "No, no, you can't do that," or "You're stupid." Now we are ready to say, "Yes, I love myself. I have a lot to offer. I am capable of having fun. I am capable of doing good, and no one can sidetrack me from who I really am."
When you fall in love with yourself, you begin to feel the positive self-esteem that comes when we don't deflate ourselves. You're ready to take yourself out for tea or to that wonderful spa for a day, or to go back and play the piano, which you always wanted to do. You're ready to recognize all the tools of wisdom that you have to offer. You're ready
to recognize that you have an Enchanted Self that deserves to be part of your every day. When you love yourself, you know when you need help. You know when you need guidance. It isn't a narcissistic love where you feel that you are perfect. It's a love of yourself, as you would love a child. If the child is ill, you take the child to the doctor. If the child comes home with a good paper from school, you put it on the refrigerator. It's a self-acknowledgment that makes you viable, real, and whole. Now you've become really ready to see the story of your life in a positive light. Even the disappointments, even tragedies have served only to hone you like tempered steel. You've been through the battles and have emerged stronger. You're in charge of your own self, a most wonderful feeling!
Gateway Three: Learning to Meet Our Needs and Negotiate Successfully
There's nothing more demoralizing than a woman who does not know how to speak up for herself, who doesn't have a voice for herself. When we feel ignored or not understood, we can feel rage and anger building. Often as women we find ourselves in a predicament where we don't know how to speak up. We simply don't know how to negotiate for what we want. While sometimes it's a cultural attitude that we've taken on, for instance that women should be demure, quiet, and modest, often it's due to a lack of understanding the appropriate skill-set necessary for negotiating effectively. All of these factors put a tremendous pressure on our true capacities. Our future happiness or fulfillment is restricted simply because we don't know the right road to get there.
Learning how to meet our needs and how to negotiate appropriately is a lot of work, but the satisfaction far outweighs the work. When you have been able to speak with integrity
to a husband, mother-in-law or a boss, when you have been able to finish a level of training that moves you ahead professionally, you're really living your Enchanted Self.
You feel as special as you deserve to feel. It's worth every moment of effort.
Gateway Four: Replenishment - Truly coming home to our Enchanted Self
Replenishment, joy, pleasure and delight are all parts of truly coming home to our Enchanted Selves. If any gateway is the pivotal gateway for a woman, it is this gateway.
This is the gateway that we must return to above all others, as frequently as possible. It is where we fuel up, where we energize. It is where we fill ourselves again so that we can meet the needs of others, be the caretakers of the world, bring up our children, spend time with the elderly, and do the hundreds of womanly tasks that we do, including having a full time job and running a home.
It may seem strange to you at first, but the smartest way to fill up again once we’ve become depleted is to bring personal satisfaction and replenishment back into our own lives. This means really knowing who you are, loving yourself and knowing how to meet your needs. If you feel rejuvenated after a great game of tennis, then that works for you. If you try to fill up by going to a comedy performance or having a massage, you may remain on empty if it isn't right for you. Choosing what is right differs from person to person, so invest some good thought into finding out what is right for yourself. In THE ENCHANTED SELF: A Positive Therapy, I teach how to sort through your memories to get to know yourself, so that you can really tune in on the best forms of replenishment, joy and pleasure for you. A general rule of thumb is to look for what has felt good in the past, and try to either duplicate it or find a way to transform the activity into a form that works for your present stage of life. For example, a long swim in a lake in childhood might now be light swimming, walking in the pool at the local “Y,†and a cup of coffee!
Gateway Five: Coming Home or Going Away, Finding Tribes in Which to Belong
As women we find ourselves automatically belonging to certain groups. There's the family we're born into, the family we may have created through marriage, and all sorts of other groups going on in our lives: PTA groups, office colleagues and church affiliations, etc.
Many women don't realize how critical it is to belong to groups. Depression feeds very quickly off of isolation. By nature most women not only share commonly in our care taking and in our concerns about others, but we enjoy and thrive when we're a part of the right groups. We want to be connected. We don't want to be isolated.
Choosing the right groups, the right tribes to belong to, is part of the dilemma and the wonderment of going through adult life. While our children don't always have much freedom in choosing what groups they belong to, sometimes they can be so greatly against an activity that we finally let them quit. We may let them leave the Girl Scouts or little league, or perhaps stop taking piano lessons, thus letting them make their own determinations.
But we, as adult women, can on the whole always have the privilege and luxury of picking our groups. It may well be time, as your children get older, to say "goodbye" forever to the PTA. It may be time to find a religious affiliation that is or is not connected to your heritage or what you were initially exposed to.
Gateway Six: Sharing Our Wisdom, Mentoring and Being Mentored
As women, we live in a golden age. We have more education than women have historically had access to. We live longer; we're healthier; we look better. Everything is really in our favor if we know how to absorb and share our wisdom and knowledge. The key to making use of all our opportunities, and maybe even the key to a happy and healthy longevity, is learning what we need to learn. What a lot of women don't realize is that mentoring can come in many different forms. I can be sitting with an 85-year-old
woman and in listening to the story of her life have my heart warmed and my courage heightened, just by hearing the things she's had to deal with and live through in her many years. I can also be in the presence of a two-year-old and learn the infectious, delightful nature of laughter once more, a lesson I may have forgotten too often. I can be taking a walk at the shore, listening to the sounds of the ocean waves and letting them soothe me, reminding me of the constancy of Mother Nature and her efforts to keep the world whole and in rhythm. Wherever a woman passes in her life, she can be giving and receiving profound levels of exchange with nature and with other people of all ages and all stages of life. This is indeed what the good life is all about.
Gateway Seven: Positive Action, Remember the Notion of a Good Deed
This Gateway is the gateway of positive action, or “Why not do a good deed, it can’t hurt!†We're all faced with bouts of discouragement, letdowns and disappointments, and for women, certainly the cycle of life itself has its ups and downs. Anyone fortunate enough to have longevity on her side will inevitably sustain losses and disappointments. None of the Gateways to Happiness can totally prevent a person from the necessary bumps and grinds of life, but what they do provide are mechanisms not only with which to pick ourselves up heroically, but to strengthen ourselves and make the world a better place for us. One of the very best ways to do this is through positive action. I look at positive action in three ways.
For one thing, it's good practice to take positive action, whether it's about a personal issue in your own life, or to help others. This forces us to practice timeliness, good behaviors, and often good logic and decision-making.
Secondly, taking positive action can definitely help offset loneliness, letdown feelings, and feelings of discouragement. It does this by the act of pushing us into connecting with people, sharing with people and having the opportunity to experience the happiness shared by others when they are affected by something positive that we do. The cliché, “A smile is more infectious than a frown,†definitely holds true in this case.
Thirdly, doing positive action helps us to grow emotionally and spiritually. And it helps the world at large. It is a win-win for everybody and everything alive.
Positive psychology in general and the Enchanted Self Gateways to Happiness emphasize how important and how much fun it can be to rediscover the best of ourselves.
I wish you good luck and good times as you enter the Gateways to Happiness!
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein is a Positive Psychology expert and the author of THE ENCHANTED SELF: A Positive Therapy, RECIPES FOR ENCHANTMENT: The Secret Ingredient is YOU!, There Comes a Time in Every Woman’s Life for DELIGHT! and her latest book THE TRUTH, I’m Ten, I’m Smart and I Know Everything! Originator of THE ENCHANTED SELF®, Dedicated to Delight, Purpose and of course, Feeling Good About Ourselves! The Enchanted Self - Dr. Barbara Holstein.
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